love and hate.

i dont know how to describe what exactly i feel right now. but im very sure that only my heart n mind can discover whats on it. i just love.. and hate someone right now. it all happen in 1 time. im hoping for a hope and also faith between us. even though i belong to someone. but it seem like theres a still have another part for him. he is just nobody who i met long time before. im catting with him. while chit chat -ing i can feel that i missed him soo much. i dnt know why. please YA ALLAH,aku rindu dia saat bersamanya. aku rindu dia saat aku ingat dia. kuasa apakah itu? aku mahu pedoman. aku mahu petunjuk. gosh! what makes me turn to be this way? everything goes wrong since i met him last time. him. all i can do is sighhs.

emotional night.

13sept11. i felt really sad tonight. i miss my family in kb. esp my grandma. the person i miss so much is my dad. i think he is not really care about us anymore. i miss the happiness. i miss everything about my family. oh my! im crying. i never wanted to have this kind of family. this year's eid mubarak, we have to sacrifice our time to my family side my mom and my dad. it is unfair. i envy looking at the picture of my dad's family in the album of khas group in fb. i miss them and i fel that i really hate my stepmum! shes the reason why my dad didnt care about us anymore. i hate her! i swear!!!!! dont care how much she try to te nice to us,she still bad in my eyes! i hate her! she take my dad away from us! weel. this is life which u have to choose! yes. LIFE IS ABOUT TO CHOOSE. whatever happens,u must choose 1 things among two. i hope with this kind of situation i will become more matured and i can prepare well for my family in the future. YA ALLAH,please help me and show me the path to live this life following the truth way of islamic life. ;'( all tonight is about family. i missed them so much.